hey! how are you feeling today?
it’s quite gray outside here in brooklyn. I feel like these past few days, I’ve been a lot more sensitive to weather changes. I’m almost manically happy on sunny days and feeling more depressive when it’s cloudy. anyone else feeling like this?
one of the reasons why I think I’v been more weather-sensitive is because I’ve been looking out my bedroom window a whole lot more, soaking up every ounce of outside life as I can #cabinfever. and living in a new york apartment, let me tell you: I’ve never felt more fortunate to have two windows in my bedroom (luxe level: in-between having a dishwasher and having a doorman). yes, I am certainly counting my blessings as we speak…but also, is this what life has come to?!? blessings = windows? sanitizer = currency?! routines = constantly shifting and/or nonexistent?!
speaking of routines, I’ve realized that while something like looking out the window used to be a small part of my (pre-pandemic) morning ritual, it has now been upgraded to a main source of “IRL” social interaction. even though the stream of joggers, bagel-eaters, dog-walkers, and horn-blaring traffic is now next-to-none on the streets below. somehow, just looking outside helps instill some sense of normalcy for me. I see the trees bud because spring is still coming. I hear the garbage trucks collecting trash bags because my neighbors are still eating, drinking, and living. I know that life is still progressing in some way even though it feels like time has stopped.
……while also becoming hyper-responsive to passing clouds and partial sun.
in any case, I like the idea of starting a v casual mid-week check-in, especially during these weird-ass times, but hopefully beyond as well. I’m hoping it can be a time to tune into some feelings, acknowledge some struggles, and create some space for gratitude, too. what do you think?
here are some things I have been struggling with:
- calling all of this “the new normal” (I keep hearing it as “there’s no end in sight!” as I panic internally)
- having no idea how much to pack for a likely trip back home (see parenthetical in #1)
- getting outside
- maintaining the energy to keep up a healthy perspective about…pretty much everything
but here are also some things I have been grateful for lately:
- the truly essential people, many of whom have been under-appreciated for too long, who continue to keep society functioning during all of this
- not needing to go back to Michigan because of my parents’ health (they are great)
- this eloquent essay that perfectly sums up a lot of feelings I have been having
- this 1-minute and 41-second reminder about creating work you feel good about
- being able to work on some creative projects over the past week
- virtual cooking & dinner parties
- toaster waffles with peanut butter and bananas
- how easy and cost-free starting a gratitude list is
(isn’t it great when the pros beat the cons in the butt?)
be well xx
(feature image photo credit: ducminh nguyen)